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Post by Virgil Reality on Jan 27, 2011 9:03:31 GMT 8
Well feedback's good - but honestly, must be someone else willing to have a go. Please.
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Neferisis
Hans Afficionado
Just a dreamer holding on to what is precious: hope
Posts: 106
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Post by Neferisis on Jan 27, 2011 9:31:01 GMT 8
A harrowing scream made the background music to a full halt. All glances concentrated on where the Matheson Mafia group was dhining. A very tense silence followed. Just the strained munching of some could be heard. The Pinot Grigio was poisoned! The whole Mafia began shouting and stumbling, as they were falling to the ground, but to later rise up fully transformed in –beautiful - zombies. After all, their Zombieshields TM (patent pending) proved to be useless! Those who didn’t touch the Pinot, frightfully receded and tried to escape. The Billy, Bill, Timothy, Jimmy and Tony zombies resumed playing their instruments, but a very loud and annoying thunder from the skies was heard. Up on a small cliff, a powerful figure was seen: it was MordredZombie! With so many Matheson zombies swaying around, those Mafia members who didn’t touch the Pinot desperately drank the last drops. But, what was MordredZombie doing at this zombie film set? Was he intending to kill everyone, to fully destroy this movie milieu? “Bring me right here my costume designer, if you all don’t want to perish! I want to sue him for animal cruelty! Look at this poor wolf fellow I’m wearing as a hat!” MordredZombie relentlessly uttered.
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Post by Gg on Jan 27, 2011 10:39:54 GMT 8
James Acheson, Costumer Designer for Mists of Avalon steps forward, grasping desperately the useless ZombieShield TM (pending):
"Let me get this straight" he shutters in MorderdZombie's direction. "You're a flesh eating Zombie who's concerned with animal rights?!!"
"I'm a vegetarian,...don't JUDGE me!" Hisses MordredZombie who isnotsodifferentthanlivingMordredasidefromtheslipendsandeczema.
James moves the shield to guard his assets as he runs away hollering "I'm going to call the Humane Society!!!"
Suddenly, ZombieDina who is basically Dina with more clothes on and a little more mellow than living Dina, jumps between MordredZombie and the Matheson Mafia.
"THEY LOVED YOU and YOU'VE TURNED ON THEM!!!"
(okay so maybe still not what you'd call mellow...)
Matheson Mafiosa #1 still sipping her Poisoned Pinot lifts her glass as a scuffle ensues, "You GO girl!!!!"
Matheson Mafiosa #2 turns to her "that's poisoned you realize?"
"What's the point of stopping now?" as Matheson Mafiosa #1 tips back her glass, "by the way,... is my nose is beginning to look like Michael Jackson's circa 2003?"
"no but I think your chest is shrinking"
"that's not the Pinot"
Andromeda rounds the corner and looks at her "Mommy...?!"
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Post by Virgil Reality on Jan 28, 2011 8:31:44 GMT 8
Brilliant Neferisis - you really got it. Others too?
Well filming was totally shot for that day so the director called for a wrap ( he has a large selection in a range of colours sourced from a stand on the corner of Marylebone and Great Portland Streets.) Perseus and Io headed for his trailer, desperate for a Crown Lager and some Samboys.
But their way was blocked by Andromeda. "Not so fast mortals," she threatened. "Which of you poisoned the Pinot?"
"Aww" whined (as in really whined) Perseus."It was just a little fun"
"See what you've done? Once those MathesonMafiazombies catch the Hanscharacterzombies, we'll never get them to set Ixas free. Such temptations are too much for any zombie. And I don't even want to consider the implications should .."
But a swirl of red curtains and a glittter of golden cuffs distracted them. Nerozombie was swaying towards them, droning "Mother, mother, mother, mother"
"I'm not your mother," moaned Andromeda fearfully. But Nerozombie was, like, totally focused in a wellfocusedforazombie kind of way. How would they be able to get him to turn and join Mordedzombie, Aleczombie and Coward zombie as they swayed uselessly in front of the Matheson mafia, yet still held back by the forces of the Zombieshields TM (patent pending).
But the Zombieshields had been manufactured by Dodgy Brothers Inc, a company notorious for exploiting workers in third world countries. stripping first growth rain forests, people smuggllng and teasing kittens. Just how well would the Zombieshields TM (patent pending) stand up to use in the field?
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Post by cat on Jan 28, 2011 17:22:20 GMT 8
I would love to write something for this, but I'm really bad at this kind of storytelling!
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Neferisis
Hans Afficionado
Just a dreamer holding on to what is precious: hope
Posts: 106
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Post by Neferisis on Jan 29, 2011 3:03:15 GMT 8
I would love to write something for this, but I'm really bad at this kind of storytelling! That's exactly what I thought of myself, and see the nice compliment I received from Virg! It's about having fun and letting the zombie muses come to our silly nightmares! ;D
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Post by cat on Jan 29, 2011 7:49:25 GMT 8
That's exactly what I thought of myself, and see the nice compliment I received from Virg! It's about having fun and letting the zombie muses come to our silly nightmares! ;D LOL....Neferisis, I'm hoping I still know how to have fun! ;-) I guess I'm just not a writer of stories.
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Neferisis
Hans Afficionado
Just a dreamer holding on to what is precious: hope
Posts: 106
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Post by Neferisis on Feb 2, 2011 10:09:16 GMT 8
(...) But Nerozombie was, like, totally focused in a wellfocusedforazombie kind of way. How would they be able to get him to turn and join Mordedzombie, Aleczombie and Coward zombie as they swayed uselessly in front of the Matheson mafia, yet still held back by the forces of the Zombieshields TM (patent pending). But the Zombieshields had been manufactured by Dodgy Brothers Inc, a company notorious for exploiting workers in third world countries. stripping first growth rain forests, people smuggllng and teasing kittens. Just how well would the Zombieshields TM (patent pending) stand up to use in the field? (Imagine this conversation as occurring among the Matheson Mafias beneath the Zombieshields TM (patent pending). - Can’t anyone see what’s going on out there? - It’s too foggy, all of a sudden! - What is it… a bird? - Or is it an airplane? - I see a pair of blue tights… No! Oh my god! It’s Henry Caville coming in drag to our rescue! - He’s not in drag, you idiot! He’s getting into character for the Superguy! - Then…why the stiletto red boots? (The fog dissipates. Caville explains.) - Dear people, please forgive my appearance, and don’t take me wrong… just blame my costume designer. I’m here to rescue you, to get you out of these wickedly-exploitatively-and-badly-manufactured Zombieshields! And… a little constrained though, due to the red briefs I’m wearing outside! (A crunch is heard. James Acheson -Costumer Designer for Mists of Avalon- bursts.) - Don’t look back at me, for God’s sake! I’m just passing by… resume your dialog, nothing here to nose about! However, the dissipated fog had finally revealed they were all just standing in front of… TO BE CONTINUED… ;D
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Post by Gg on Feb 2, 2011 10:14:40 GMT 8
BRILLIANT!!!! Current events!!!!
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Post by Virgil Reality on Feb 2, 2011 18:10:34 GMT 8
The opening to Medusa's lair. Surely the zombies lurching towards the opening would be immune to Medusa's stare? And what of the MathesonMafiazombies lurching and swaying in their wake?
But between the two groups lurched Nerozombie, struggling as Dinazombie attempted to turn him in the direction of the disappearing Hanscharacterzombies and away from The StrangeFruitzombies, who seemed to be one member short - where was Brianzombie? See the missing member, Nerozombie had seen an opportunity to get into the music business.
"I sing, and I play a mean lyre" he intoned.
Not that the StrangeFruitzombies cared. Beanozombie and Rayzombie has espied the WOTT director setting up the next scene and were intent of finding out how he could be considering making a movie without them in it.
"A lute would be more harmonious with their sound," Caravvagiazombie implored, nudging Nerozombie aside.
Buuuuuut the wail of a guitar rent the air, the gleam of red pleather and the glow of paisley polyester dazzled the zombieonlookers and......
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Post by Gg on Feb 3, 2011 5:21:21 GMT 8
LukeZombie, complete with zombieeyeliner, wails away on his black pacifica, "Little Wing" echoing through Medusa's chamber.
"Whatever" cried CarravagioZombie "If you're afraid of the classics"
"This is a classic!!!!!" screams transvestite Superman, complete with red patten leather high heal boots.
The MathesonMafia lurchs toward him. "Crap, I can't run in these" cries he as he stumbles towards a column.
But before he can reach it IXAS, restored, his skin supple, his body one fluid movement, emerges from behind it, bow pulled taught, screaming to him "EYES DOWN".
MEDUSA in all her supermodel glory rears up behind IXAS, hissing bitterly. Superman has buried his head in the dust. The Matheson Mafia, after pushing MathesonMafiosoJonathonZombie behind a rock, send out a screeching howl of laughter "we're woman!! You can't hurt us"
"ARE YOU KIDDING", laughs Medusa "After all the sh&t men have put me through, I've turned the other cheek! converted! I've gone to the DARK SIDE!!!... and you only hurt the ones you love...." Her beautiful albeit wriggling countenance alerts to monsterous, her eyes shoot rays of terror, the Mafia freeze in their tracks... "all we wanted was his boots" squeaks out one just her lips turn to stone.
CarravagioZombie turns to Ixas -- "You know,...she can't do sh&t to me, I've already been bitten once and look at me! cute as a button! But I think I will take advantage of this opportunity" CarravagioZombie pulls a canvas out from nowhere, stick his thumb in the air, and begins to draw feverishly. Medusa, supermodel that she is, starts a succession of poses.
"Oh you dangerous thing" can be heard sung by the nearly complete StillCrazyZombies in the background.
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Post by Virgil Reality on Feb 3, 2011 7:27:18 GMT 8
As Caravaggiozombie roughly sketches an outlne of Medusa, she writhes to get a glimpse of the portrait.
"Oh I look pretty" she cries a la Keira Knightley in "Love Actually". "And I love he way you've rendered the folds in those backdrop curtains. Now if only I had curtains like that. This lair is so stony and bare. And oh - yes, A dress Say velvet, maybe green would look good with my colouring"
Nerozombie's red curtain drapes attracted her attention and she was just about to pounce when she noticed Frederickzombie, long tresses swinging as her zombied his way towards the other Mathesoncharacterzombies who were, now that Medusa was busy with the Mathesonmafiazombies and Ixas seemed to be Notazzombie, assemling near the craft services.
Perseus surveyed the chaos as he returned from his trailer
"Strewth,mate" he complains to the WOTT director, who stands dumbfounded, Bubo on his wrist, considering how to edit all this cr*p
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Post by Gg on Feb 3, 2011 7:44:37 GMT 8
can a mechanical bird, technically, be turned into a zombie? LIKING the slang! I'm gonna use that in a sentence this week.
Maybe "Strewth! It's cold"
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Neferisis
Hans Afficionado
Just a dreamer holding on to what is precious: hope
Posts: 106
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Post by Neferisis on Feb 3, 2011 8:58:59 GMT 8
LOL! Virg and Gg! ;D
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Post by Gg on Feb 9, 2011 3:55:20 GMT 8
WOTT director, Jonathon Leibesman, screams after Sam, as he makes his way to his trailer
"IF WARNER BROTHERS HAD JUST CAST HANS IN THE SEQUEL, WE COULD'VE AVOIDED ALL OF THIS!!!!"
Gemma, who has just walked up behind him says, over his shoulder "I tried to tell them..."
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